Update: Happy April Fools' Day!

An unnamed spokesperson with the National Security Agency has confirmed that a rogue hacker has been waging covert “Jason Bourne-style” cyber attacks on terrorist strongholds around the world. He or she is believed to be a graduate of Norwich University’s nationally vaunted cybersecurity program.

Said one unnamed NSA official, who spoke on condition of anonymity, “This is one serious cyber-shit-kicking superhero. Glad he or she is working for us … for now.”